Movie: The Master (2012)

I was reminded of Infinite Jest1 the entire time I watched 2012’s The Master2.  Both works are way too long and pretentious.  This Paul Thomas Anderson3 film stars Philip Seymour Hoffman4 and Joaquin Phoenix5.

Dir: Paul Thomas Anderson

Starring Joaquin Phoenix, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Amy Adams

Watched on blu-ray

1 You know, the 1996 David Foster Wallace novel, roughly a third of which is in the endnotesi.

i Yep, I actually read the goddamn thing.  I found more of interest in it than I did, say, Ulysses, though I can’t imagine anything would make me read it a second time.

2 Goddamnit, I thought this was going to be a movie about the leader of the cult in Manos.  Nope, this is all a veiled history of the early days of L. Ron Hubbard’s founding of Scientologyi.

i There are all kinds of weird regarding the movie’s faux religion, The Causea.  What stuck with me is our Hubbard surrogate giving a wedding toast about lassoing a dragon. Did he get that from Valley of Gwangi, and just substituted a dragon for a dinosaur?b

a  Like what is going on with a blackboard with words like “coitus” and “douche” on it as a woman in front of the blackboard supposedly relates experiences from before her birth?

b I may be an atheist, but I am willing to consider a Harryhausen-based religion.

3 A character in this stomps a jailhouse toilet to pieces.  I couldn’t help but be reminded of the scene in Anderson’s Punch-Drunk Love where Sandler destroys a restaurant bathroom.  This would be a strange recurring theme to have through one’s film careeri ii.

i At least that recurring theme isn’t one of the first images in this picture.  We see a group of bored sailors on a Pacific island in WWII, and one way they find to pass the time is to make a sand woman to simulate (?) sex witha

a So I wasn’t surprised when the next stop after the war is a mental hospital, where our protagonist sees explicit sexual imagery in every card in a Rorschach test.

Actually, the first one looked like Batman to me.  How couldn’t it look like that to the future Joker?

ii Didn’t Anderson direct a movie of Infinite Jest?a

a You’re thinking of Inherent Vice, which was written by Thomas Pynchon, so kind of the same thing while not being the same thing at all.

§ “Get Thee Behind Me, Satan” What a weird-ass song.  And kudos for finding the hidden footnote!

4 So weird he’s dead, isn’t it?  I keep forgetting that until I see yet another movie he was in.

5 For a change, I didn’t believe Phoenix’s character was a real person herei.  Every second felt like I was watching a performanceii.  Unnatural.

i Talking out of only the left side of his mouth while squinting his right eye.  Is he secretly supposed to be Popeye?

ii Phoenix is supposedly a method actora, which has me even more weirded out by the scene where he may be boning a sand-womanb

a So did he actually drink ship fuel, which is apparently something sailors desperate to get drunk have actually done?

b Then there’s the scene where we see him jerking off into the ocean.  Thank all the gods that was shot from behind.