According to IMDB, Jess Franco directed 207 movies, short films and music videos.  I can admire that proficiency, but I usually appreciate quality over quantity.  The few films of his I had seen prior to watching 1970’s Count Dracula had left little impression on me other than confusion.  I was not surprised to learn Franco’s approach was not only to shoot cheap and fast, but also usually without a script or shooting permits.

But I was surprised he made this version of the classic tale with Christopher Lee, an actor who did not suffer fools.  I have heard similar things about Herbert Lom, who appears here as Dr. Van Helsing.  This also has Klaus Kinski as Renfield, but that is an entirely different of actor—one who I imagine would be more receptive to Franco’s on-the-fly approach.

I have seen a great many versions of Dracula on the screen before watching this take on it, yet this was the first time I considered the curiously mundane nature of the set-up. 

The story usually begins with the count summoning a London lawyer to this castle, to assist him with buying a house in England.  To phrase this differently, an age-old monster hires a business professional to complete a real-estate deal.  This is on par with Dr. Frankenstein calling for a plumber, but we never see anything like that happening in one of those movies.

This European adaptation initially hews fairly closely to both the original novel and the legendary film version starring Bela Lugosi.  Lee stars as the titular villain and, at first, this is more faithful overall to those works than any of the Dracula films he made for Hammer Studios.  Still, it will have a couple of unfortunate creative detours.

It has been a long time since I last read Stoker’s novel, yet I don’t recall a moment where the heroes are attacked by taxidermized animal corpses.  If there was, I hope it was more convincing in the book than it was here.  This moment is laugh-out-loud bad, and the film never quite recovers from it.

One moment that was in the book but is rarely in the film adaptations is when Dracula gifts his brides with a newborn for their dinner.  How it is handled here is just an infant crying on the soundtrack, and the brides carry away a wriggling burlap bag.  Somehow, this is even more disturbing than if they had shown the infant.  If the movie had more such genuinely unnerving moments in it, I would highly recommend it.

Of the performances, Lee fares the best, which should come as a surprise to nobody.  Lom is as dependable as ever, though I had the nagging suspicion he wasn’t happy with this production.  He just looked crankier than usual.  At one point, he looks at the camera shaking with what appears to be rage, and I thought the actor finally had enough of Franco’s haphazard manner of filming.  Really, it is his character having a stroke, which confines him to a wheelchair until conveniently he can stand and walk again without any explanation.  Alas, he does not say, “Mein Dracula, I can walk!”  Kinski is his usual inscrutable self, doing things like smearing food on the walls of the world’s least realistic padded cell, and leaving me to wonder if the actor even knew the cameras were rolling. 

The production largely looks great, if only for the locations used.  If you can’t afford sets, just shoot in any number of places in old Europe.  Alas, there are also at least two sets here, and they are deeply unconvincing.  In addition to Kinski’s padded cell, you have Harker’s bedroom in Dracula’s mansion.  I was baffled as to why they made these pathetic sets when they obviously had access to interiors in genuinely old buildings.

The most bizarre aspect of this endeavor is the sound design. In an early scene, somebody is exiting a carriage, and I discerned the sounds of monkeys in the mix of animals. At least, it is a sound I recognize from zoo visits. There is also a strange recurring sound throughout the runtime that seemed to me to be nothing less than that suction thing the dentist uses to get extra spit out of your mouth.

I have seen numerous vampire films, many of which were supposed to be adaptations of the original novel.  Count Dracula may have stayed largely faithful to the book, yet it still feels like a rather lifeless affair.  There are a few moments where it is genuinely creepy, but not enough of them.  Lee, as always, doesn’t phone in his performance, but this feels like a retread of a character he had already done for several Hammer films, and he adds nothing new to the role here.  I have the impression nobody was particularly passionate about working on this, so why did they bother retelling a story told so many times before?

Dir: Jess Franco

Starring Christopher Lee, Herbert Lom, Klaus Kinski

Watched on Severin blur-ray